Interpersonal Relationships - Types, Stages, and Importance
We all want a sense of belonging, to love and be loved. We desire success in the marketplace and life in general. We feel good about ourselves when others treat us as valuable members of society. These desires are satisfied to a large extent by our interpersonal relationships.
Since the metric we largely use to measure our success is based on the quality of our interpersonal relationships, it’s a topic worth discussing. We’ll shed some light on the types of interpersonal relationships, their stages, and importance. But, first a definition.
What are Interpersonal Relationships?
Simply put, interpersonal relationships are social connections or associations between two or more people in any form or context. These relationships are part of what makes us humans. We are social creatures so we need to bond with other humans around us at varying levels for our mental, emotional, and physical wellbeing.
Types of Interpersonal Relationships
Let’s explore the different kinds of interpersonal relationships:
Family
Family is our first encounter and experience with the world. Parent-child relationships are important due to their formative and lasting impact, they influence our self-confidence, feelings of security, and how we form relationships as we get older. They also shape how we relate with our siblings and even extended family members.
So many researches study how parent-children relationships influence a child’s development and relational health as they grow older. That’s not to say you can’t live beyond whatever limitations or hurt you suffered. It means that it’s an unavoidable part of your life you’ll always have to confront and perhaps grow from.
Friendships
Friendships are the relationships you form yourself. Unlike family members, you get to choose your friends. Even though interests, proximity, and environment influence the friendships you form, you ultimately form close friendships with people you like.
Friendship relationships allow us to express ourselves, enjoy each other’s company, and give us the space to offer and receive emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual support. We have a sense of belonging and significantly satisfy our longing to bond and connect with people when we form great friendships. Did any friend come to mind right now? Reach out and tell them how much you love them.
Dating and Marriage
Next up, we have romance. Sometimes, platonic friendships between men and women lead to dating and marriage. But, other times people connect from the onset after demonstrating romantic interest. Dating relationships are like an intense form of friendship. Traditionally, the dating or courting phase is meant for two individuals to build a stronger connection and check their compatibility for marriage. But, people do date for fun, emotional thrill, and pleasure which isn’t a great use of anyone’s time long-term.
Marriage brings a stronger commitment to a romantic relationship. It enforces the agreement between a couple to love each other, make decisions together, start a family, and live together till death. Marriage relationships form the bedrock and foundation of a healthy society.
Good marriages also equal good parenting and provide good structure and an example for kids at their highly impressionable ages. Toxic marriages do the exact opposite and negatively affect a child’s relational health and subsequent interaction with the world.
Work/Professional
From late teens to early adulthood, most of us become exposed to professional or business settings. We form social relationships with our boss, colleagues, customers, and clients. While some of these interactions may lead to friendships due to proximity, especially with co-workers, they are usually official, centered around work, and the organization’s goals.
Organisational/Religious
Most people form social connections through religious and hobby activities. 70% of my close friends, I met in church. People are often united by faith and similar interests. So swimmers, chess players, gym enthusiasts, and so on will interact with other people with the same interest. Close friendships may develop over time, but they may remain a cordial and communal relationship.
Stages of Interpersonal Relationships
According to psychologist George Levinger, relationships are formed in different stages. His focus was on romantic relationships, but it applies to friendships as well.
Acquaintanceship
An acquaintance is someone that you’ve met once or twice. You form an acquaintance from a first impression and mostly brief subsequent interactions due to proximity, similar interests, or places you frequent. Remember the shop owner on your street you say hello to when you pass by? She qualifies as an acquaintance.
Buildup
During this stage, people form a closer bond with each other. They begin to care more about their personal life experiences and build trust and intimacy from similar values, interests, or connections.
Let’s assume that you and the shop owner begin to hang out about twice a week at her store just to catch up. One day, you invite her over to your house and she reciprocates the gesture. There’s the buildup phase. You’re forming a relationship beyond acquaintanceship.
Continuation
This is a stage of mutual commitment and stability. You both demonstrate consistent care for each other. It’s a long, stable period where both parties become comfortable with each other. For romantic relationships, this is the latter part of dating and the whole length of marriage. For you and the shop owner, it’s a close friendship where you call, visit, support, and show up for one another.
Deterioration
Not all relationships deteriorate, but unfortunately, some do. And, if you’ve lived long enough, you can relate to experiencing a deteriorating relationship. A deteriorating relationship is marked by infrequent communication, lack of trust, resentment, and boredom. It can be due to unresolved hurts, betrayals, or other relational problems.
For you and the shop owner, maybe you moved away and communication dropped drastically. Maybe she tried reaching out to you a couple of times, but you were consumed with life at your new location so you couldn’t reciprocate the favour.
Ending
This is the end of a relationship, It may be due to an intentional severing of ties, the death of a loved one, or long distance. Whatever the reason, there’s no more communication or interaction between the parties involved. Maybe your shop owner friend finally stopped reaching out to you and you eventually lost contact and never saw her again.
Importance of Interpersonal Relationships
Strengthening the different types of interpersonal relationships in our lives to a reasonable level is essential to our health and well-being. Why?
Satisfies a deep longing
Enhances our psychological well-being
Improves our relational skills & emotional intelligence
Boosts happiness
I started this article by saying we all want a sense of belonging, to love and be loved. That’s true. We’re social beings so we don’t feel okay with being socially deficient. Healthy interpersonal relationships satisfy our longing to connect with other humans.
Forming and maintaining genuine emotional connections with people is essential to our psychological and physical well-being. We have support who support our dreams, celebrate the good times with us, and encourage us through difficult seasons in our lives. Positive close relationships stabilize our physical. mental, and emotional health while reducing our focus on pain and negative experiences.
The healthier interpersonal relationships you have, the easier it is for you to form meaningful connections and interact appropriately with people you meet. Your emotional intelligence grows also, so you’re able to identify emotions in other people and respond accordingly.
You’re a happier person when you love others and feel loved. You’re happier at work when you can contribute meaningfully while comfortably interacting with people around you. Life isn’t perfect, but it’s a whole lot better when you enjoy a rich and healthy social life.
Finally, Beloved Reader
As with many, if not all things in life, you can improve your interpersonal relationships. You can learn how to form genuine bonds with people in your life and new relationships. Have you read the book “How To Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie? It’s a classic, you should totally check it out. And, if you’ve been hurt or betrayed by people you trusted and it’s affecting your relationships, I see you. I want you to know that you can heal from all the hurt you’ve suffered. There are good people in this world, perhaps, even in your life right now.
Don’t be ashamed to seek help and counsel from professionals, spiritual leaders, or anyone you believe is capable of offering sound guidance. First, believe you will heal and actively seek healing. It may be difficult and a long journey, but you will overcome it. I’ll be rooting for you!
Alright, that’ll be all for this piece. Feel free to explore our other articles.